Why do I always have to be "next?" This weekend I went to/planned/half-threw a baby shower for my non-blood (or marriage) related sister. I love welcoming new life into the world with cake, diapers full of melted chocolate, bingo games and gifts. Yet the older I get, the more common it is that everyone else at the party has a child or is pregnant with one. I am not. I'm not there yet in my life. I am absolutely happy about this. I don't feel prepared for this yet. I don't want this yet. Or maybe ever...
This used to happen at weddings. For me, no matter how many others were un-wed at the nuptials, I was always dubbed as "next" to get married. I can't explain why this is. What about my unwavering single status and string of "successful" relationships screams "I'm going to be the next one getting married! Just you wait and see!!" While we're at it, why on EARTH would you tell a single girl that she's going to be the next person having a baby shower? That's just plain irresponsible. Shouldn't those wishes of "you're next!!" go to those who are on the verge of that stage in their lives? Hey, couple that's been together for 5 years...you're next! Even then, that seems rude as well...or at least it could be. If you really think about it... maybe they've been trying for those 5 years and have had trouble conceiving. That's depressing...let's go back to amusing...
I suppose it's nicer to say "you're next" than what they're actually thinking:
"You're so far from this...how does it feel to pretend you're not sad about that?"
"If I say "you're next" maybe you'll get your shit together and get on this..."
"Oh, how sad for you to not have any of these things going on."
"Is this as uncomfortable as I expect it is for you?"
"Please do not go home and take your own life over this."
"Are you a lesbian?"